***SPECIAL SERMON***

Wellllllllllllllllll today is a most special day, brothers and sisters!!!

It is a day of celebration and affirmation, of inner peace and orgasmic release!!!

That's right, Ass Thursday is here!

And what is "Ass Thursday," thou doth ask? How do we celebrate such a day? Why, 'tis simple, my flocked up flock.

'Tis a day of indulgence most supreme!!!

For true blance to be acheived, there can be no other way. The Plague of Catholicism continues to spread like locuts across the once fertile fields of free thought. Only we and possibly the Rotarians stand in the way.

So go forth my chir'dren and indulge thy Earthly pleasures until thy bellies portrude to dangerous degrees and thy genitals appear as if they have been dragged across shag carpeting!!!

And yay this period of fun and good times shall herefore be known as "Lint," for surely our sweat-soaked body parts shall attract much of that substance during our indulgences.

Minister Scribe hath already laid the ground-work. Why just yesterday when his co-workers noticed the smudged crucifix upon the Yellow-haired demon's forehead, they did ask him what he would be giving up for "Lent," if anything.

And lo the Minister did inform them that he would be "giving up sacrfice" for this day.

And yes the Yellow demon that calls itself "Girlfriend" did react with much bitchiness and anger upon hearing that.

Aye, but those assembled did get a good chuckle out of the comment and the Minister looked and saw that it was good.

So GO!!!! dammit.

Get up off thy sedentary asses and maketh the Church of Scribe proud! Eat too much, get some ass or the thing in front, speed through a stop sign, call off work and watch movies all day, download internet porn (and sendeth a copy to the Church office for verification) or simply ignore the urge to not splurge!!!

Please turn to page 69 of the Scribeist Book of Nonsensical Hymns:

Amazing lack of Grace
Cum sit upon mine face
If you showeth me some thigh
I'll telleth thee no lies.

Please be seated.

I said SIDDOWN godammit!!!

May Chaos & Discord follow thee all the days of thy life and especially on this Ass Thursday.

Hail the great goddess who only exists in our hearts minds and groins but not in any significant intervening pray to me or wind up with AIDS way.

HAIL!!!








*report to the Church once thou hast indulged so that we may prepare a newsletter similar to Letters to Penthouse and maketh a kick-ass proft off thy stories.